a progressive illness

We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better. (Alcoholics Anonymous– pg.30)

When I was growing up, cultural/societal attitudes towards alcoholism were more judgmental- alcoholics were more often referred to as “drunks” that were weak people lacking in moral character and willpower rather than addicts suffering from a disease.

This was my thoughts and attitude- even as I was slipping into the clutches of this illness- that enabled me to deny the seriousness of my situation.

But to many people- friends and family members of those who were suffering from this disease- the  powerlessness of the alcoholic was apparent. My dad had an alcoholic father, and he no doubt recognized the symptoms and behaviors that were beginning to present in my life. More than once, he tried to warn me about this.

On one occasion when he told me that “when you start drinking, you can’t stop” I replied “it’s not that I CAN’T stop- I don’t WANT to stop”! Part of me truly believed this, and part of me just didn’t care either way. Whatever.

I wish I had listened.

Eventually, my circumstances, fate, and Providence steered me into the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. This encounter taught me that I did, indeed, suffer from an illness that is characterized by an inability to control one’s drinking.

I was able to accept this premise finally. I was able to learn and accept that I could not drink any alcohol and how this was accomplished through working the program of AA and the Twelve Steps of recovery. I got sober and stayed sober and lived according to the principles for sober living that I learned. But, alas, there was one thing that I had not quite bought into- that I had not fully internalized. Alcoholism, as described in the quote at the beginning of this post, is a “progressive” illness. As with many chronic conditions, there is no cure. But a complete and total remission can be achieved- as long as the alcoholic doesn’t drink alcohol.

In the book Alcoholics Anonymous– the “Big Book” to those in the program- there is a chapter titled “More About Alcoholism”. In it, there is a story about a fellow that recognized at the age of thirty that he had a problem with alcohol that was causing problems in his personal life and in his career. So he quit. He was so successful after that, he was able to retire at the age of fifty-five.

After twenty-five years of sobriety, he reasoned that he would now be able to drink normally- that he was no longer an alcoholic. He was wrong. After numerous hospitalizations and several vain attempts to quit- he succumbed to the deleterious physical effects of alcoholism and was dead four years later.

It is a progressive illness, and the only way to achieve remission is to not drink.

Even though I had read this story, I had to learn the hard way as alcoholics are prone to do.

After eleven years of not drinking, I reasoned that with the time that had passed, and my knowledge of the disease, I could control my drinking. I went out to a nightclub with a friend. I didn’t remember the trip home and when I woke, my truck was in the ditch in front of my house.

But, I remained undeterred, and determined that next week I would limit myself to three drinks- control my drinking. I was successful at limiting myself to three drinks and had absolutely no fun at all, The evening was unsatisfying and nerve-wracking, being constantly gnawed at by a craving to drink more.

So the next week, I decided to not limit myself to a specific number of drinks, but rather self-monitor and not let it get out of control. If I felt it was getting to be a bit much I resolved to cut myself off and enjoy the evening in that state.

I woke up the next morning in the holding cell of the county jail, having no recollection of how I got there. It is a progressive illness.

You would think I would have learned my lesson. I did quit after that, but eight years later I decided that I could surely control my drinking this time around, being older and wiser.

By the grace of God, I did not end up in jail or the hospital- I didn’t frequent bars or nightclubs- but I nevertheless discovered that I not only couldn’t control my drinking (consuming no fewer than eight beers and up to twenty-four) but I also couldn’t go a single day without it.

This was a recent event in my life, I am not proud to admit. But I am proud to say I have found my way back to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous and I truly do get it now.

I am an alcoholic. The only reprieve from the progressive illness I have, is to not drink.

Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real
alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally
different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our
drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts
to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow,
someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession
of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is
astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost
selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The
delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be
smashed.
We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to
control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers
control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but
such intervals –usually brief—were inevitably followed by still less
control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible
demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our
type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable
period we get worse, never better. (Chapter 3, “More About Alcoholism” pg.30- Alcoholics Anonymous)

If you think you may have a problem with alcohol, I pray that you will be able to overcome your addiction, and escape the clutches of your progressive illness.

Remember that we deal with alcohol — cunning, baffling, powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is One who has all power — that One is God. May you find Him now!- (Chapter 5, “How it Works” pg. 58-59- Alcoholics Anonymous)

There is a way, and there is hope. The program of Alcoholics Anonymous will teach you a way of life free from alcohol. You do not have to drink.

And being free from this progressive illness will bring true joy and freedom to your life.

That freedom comes from God. He will do what you cannot do for yourself.

30 days to forgiveness

Have you ever been so hurt by someone, done so wrong, lied to, betrayed, offended, stolen from, cheated- or worse- that you knew you would never be able to forgive them? When you feel with all your heart that they don’t deserve your forgiveness- and probably couldn’t care less if you did.

It’s even more difficult when they aren’t the least bit sorry about what they did. Not only is it hard to forgive some things- sometimes it is harder to even want to forgive.

You can forgive anyone for anything- and I know how.

Many years ago, when I went into the wonderful program of Alcoholics Anonymous (if you think you might be an alcoholic, you will never find a better way to turn that around) I was carrying a deep resentment. 

The woman I was married to at that time had had an affair. I forgave her because I loved her. But the dude- no. Not ever. I didn’t know him, but I knew one thing about him, and I was not going to ever forget it or forgive it. The only thing I ever intended was to provide him with a royal butt whipping if I ever got the chance. 

When you get into the AA program, you learn how to let all these resentments go. As my sponsor told me, resentment is the first thing that will make you want to drink again. I told him this dude had never apologized to me, he had no right to do what he did, and he was, in my mind the lowest, sorriest person to ever come into my life.

No, he did not deserve my forgiveness, and he was never going to get it. 

My sponsor explained to me that he likely knew nothing about how I felt, and even if he did, he probably didn’t care. It didn’t make any difference in his life how I felt- whether I forgave him or not. I had to forgive him for me. For my peace of mind, for my spiritual and emotional life. For my sobriety. 

But how? I hate this person. I do NOT want to forgive him. My sponsor then told me that he knew how to do this: I would pray for this person everyday.

What?

He said I promise you if you pray for him everyday- within 30 days you will forgive him. At first the prayers will not be sincere, he advised, but you just keep doing it and it will work.

Highly skeptical and doubting, but understanding the need to let this resentment go, I tried it out. At first the prayers were very insincere, as I sarcastically asked God to bless this person, to help him in his life, to help him find happiness and peace. 

After about two weeks of doing this, as I prayed for him- I was shocked to find out that it WAS working. I was so stunned I immediately quit doing it. 

But eventually, I got back around to it and eventually forgave him. It was wonderful to have the burden of that anger and resentment out of my life. 

Jesus had a lot to say about forgiveness, and one of the most stark messages about forgiving others is this statement:

Matthew 6: ¹⁴ For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:  ¹⁵ But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Having learned this lesson, Peter reasoned there surely must be some limits to this forgiveness. I mean, we are not suckers. Okay- forgive someone their wrongs, but what if they just take advantage of that and play you for a fool over and over:

Matthew 18: ²¹ Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? ²² Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

In other words, everytime. We are to forgive everyone for everything- everytime.

Matthew 5: ⁴⁴ But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; ⁴⁵ That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

Many of you no doubt remember the story of Amber Guyger last year. She was a police officer. One night she came home and went into the wrong apartment. Upon finding a person in the apartment, the resident Botham Jean, she shot and killed him. After her trial, in which she was convicted for is murder, the victim’s brother, Brandt Jean, stunned the court and the world, by asking the judge if he could give Amber a hug. 

In a poignant moment of forgiveness, Brandt Jean hugs Amber Guyger, the police officer convicted of murdering his brother

It was truly one of the most beautiful acts of forgiveness I have ever witnessed. What a great man he is to be willing to forgive after what this woman did to his brother, his family, and him. What faith and understanding of what God expects us to do. He truly is a child of God.

You can forgive anyone for anything. I promise. And you can do it in 30 days.

I’m Back!

I’ve been through the “Refiner’s Fire”.

Isaiah 48:10- Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver; I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction.

It sucked. But what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger as people like to say.

I’m looking forward to this! I hope you all are too.

 

Forgiving yourself can be the hardest one of all

Today is Ben’s birthday. It’s been just over two years now since my little brother Ben died. And I spent a lot of that time with the guilt of knowing I had caused his death.

Ben had walked to his office to sleep on the couch in the wee hours when he fell down a flight of stairs and suffered a massive head injury.  We were texting when it happened.

He had moved to the Chicago area in 1995 and we had fallen out of touch. My New Year’s resolution in 2018 was to reconnect with my family. So I did. We were both grateful to renew our relationship and to again have those long conversations about all kinds of goofy stuff- personal lives, old times, conspiracies, religion.

We were discussing the afterlife when he died.

I sent my last text to him at 2:30 am. After waiting a few minutes, I chuckled and decided he must have passed out on me. At 3 am, a strange feeling came over me. Like all of a sudden everything was different. Everything was wrong. As if someone had clicked down the Contrast button three shades darker on the whole world. On my soul.

I found out the next day that he had died. Immediately I knew it was my fault. I had been texting him and distracted him while he was going down those stairs. My last text to him, and the last thing he read in this world- “What do you think is the literal meaning of the ‘Second Death’?” As he lay dying, he was in agony over the second death. The cloud that had come over was my condemnation. My punishment for causing his death. The police had asked his wife who Darryl was. They told her that he had been having a conversation with me when he fell. They knew I had cursed him.

A couple of months later, my Dad died of complications from heart surgery.  I had reconnected with him to. There had been friction in our relationship and one day we yelled and screamed in his front yard and then cried and hugged, finally understanding each other and forgiving each other. I knew he had died of a broken heart from Ben. And now I was responsible for two deaths in my family.

I had reconnected with both of them and they both died. Ben was young and my Dad was healthy. I was some sort of dark force I decided. Somehow, my compulsion to reconnect was a harbinger of Death. Terrified of whom I might kill next, I pulled away. I descended into a very dark place. I built a wall around myself and waited to die.

I pleaded with God many times to turn back the clock and take me and not Ben. I begged Him to take His curse off of me.

And then, one day I didn’t tell God what I wanted Him to do. I didn’t accuse Him of taking the wrong person, or blame Him for cursing me. I simply said “Father, what do you want me to do?”

There are stories in the Good Book about God talking to people in a burning bush, with thunders and lightnings booming out of the clouds. There was nothing like that for me. Suddenly, like the night my world dimmed, the light came back. My thoughts quieted. My anxiety stopped. There was a peace over my whole being, and then in the way the God assures us, understanding came into my mind.

“Ben was very grateful that you had reconnected with him. The late night talks with you were one of the things he enjoyed most. That night he was happy when he left.

You were there with him when he passed, and he was comforted.”

As I cried and felt overwhelmed with this knowledge and the relief of the darkness being lifted, I understood. It was Ben’s time. It was my Dad’s time. And even though someday soon it will be- it is not my time- yet.

With that time we have been given, God expects us to let our light shine, so others can see what God has done for us, and will want it for themselves.

Challenges and pain continue to come in my life, and always will. They are opportunities for growth. They are the time to lean on God and His understanding. God doesn’t curse us, He gives us a chance to show that in every circumstance we will depend on Him, and have faith that hard times, disappointment, and pain are a fire through which we can either come out stronger- or let them consume us. Throw us off course. Blame God and choose our own way.

I didn’t cause Ben or my Dad to die. I am not cursed. What I did do wrong was let these challenges put out my fire. Instead of leaning on God, I wanted to bargain with Him. I wanted to tell Him what He had done wrong, and how He should fix things.

When we are hurt, disappointed, angry- we can either run from our problems and tell God He has made a mistake, or we can put our hand in His and face it together. We ask Him what does He want us to do to solve our problems and overcome them. And when we do that, we find peace and understanding. It is WHY we are here.

I love you Dad and Ben. I am grateful that we healed our relationships. I know in a coming day I will see you both again. I will try to make you both proud of me.

And I will try to make God proud of me. He has given me a wonderful life, and I am very grateful.

to my readers

I am grateful to everyone who takes the time to read my blog. I hear things, I pass them on. I have an opinion, I share it. This is more than a hobby, it is a labor of love.

I never had any illusion of being big time, with millions and gazillions of readers. I don’t even have thousands of readers. But, every month, a few hundred people check in to see what I have to say, and I am humbled by that.

I have taken on some new things. I have picked up another part time job- one must pay the bills. But. more importantly, I have gone back to school. At the tender young age of 55, I am looking to enhance my career options and try new things.

It just isn’t going to be possible for me to devote the time I once did to this blog. I am not going to give it up- I enjoy it too much, and I feel a certain obligation to the small group who faithfully take the time to read it- but it will have to be done, for the time being, at a reduced rate.

Since starting just short of 15 months ago, I have always put out a “News of the Week- In Links.” It may not be possible to do this every week. I would suggest going to my “Bondo reads” page and checking with the sources I list there if you are a news hound. Most of what I link to every week comes from those websites.

I still have lots of subjects and articles I am interested in pontificating about, and will continue to do so as time allows.

Thanks again for your support- and this is not the end!

the mandela effect

Do you remember when Delilah cut off Samson’s hair? So do I. Or how about the verse about when there will be peace on Earth and the Lion will lie down with the Lamb? This is a famous verse that is depicted in numerous artworks.

They are not in the Bible. At least, not anymore.

Judges 16:19- And she made him sleep upon her knees; and she called for a man, and she caused him to shave off the seven locks of his head; and she began to afflict him, and his strength went from him.

I’m not a Bible scholar, but I have read the Good book numerous times, and I don’t remember Delilah sending for a man to cut off Samson hair. I remember she did it herself. If you do an internet search for Samson and Delilah artwork and images, that is how many others remember it as well. What about the Lion and the Lamb?

Isaiah 11:6- The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them.

These are examples of a phenomenon known as The Mandela Effect. Named after the former South African political prisoner, and later President, Nelson Mandela. Many people recall he died in prison- and remember his funeral and his widow’s speech. I personally remembered his being released from prison and many years, and later becoming South African president, so I originally considered this stuff nonsense on a par with “the Flat Earth theory” and the people who believed it to be quite off their rocker.

Scientists call these false memories confabulation. This involves the brain filling in gaps in memories with other related images and ideas. However, that this happens on a mass scale and with such commonly shared beliefs- there are theories about other explanations such as alternate realities, quantum changes, and other supernatural forces.

Like the above-referenced Bible examples- as I heard more about these phenomenon, I don’t so easily dismiss them as mass hysteria anymore. Do you remember the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz carrying a pistol?

I don’t remember Scarecrow carrying a pistol dangit- do you? But, apparently- he does. How do you remember the line in the Kevin Costner movie Field of Dreams? I remember the whispered, supernatural voice-  “if you build it they will come.”

The “they” that will come was the old Black Sox players and other legends- and they did come. Many people remember this as well. But, apparently, in the movie the line is “if you build it, he will come.”

Do you remember a hyphen in KitKat? (There isn’t). Do you remember Mighty Mouse having an “M” on his shirt? (He doesn’t).

How about the old expression “as busy as Grand Central Station?” There is no Grand Central Station- but a Grand Central Terminal- however, it is commonly referred to as “Station”, so that one really doesn’t count.

There are alot of interesting videos on Youtube about the Mandela Effect. I have to say, it is probably all just mistaken memories- but I swear Darth Vader said “Luke, I am your father.” (He didn’t- he said “no, I am your father”) and I know I heard Captain Kirk say “Beam me up Scotty!”- but he never did.

Bill Bean ‘The Spiritual Warrior’- The Mandela Effect

what got me banned on Facebook

In 2015, after a few years of Facebook citizenship, I decided to take a break. Primarily because of non-stop posts about football, Jade Helm, and the end of the world. I found myself in a constant state of aggravation wanting to argue about sports, outdo someone with a conspiracy theory, and be the first to post a breaking news story amongst the 250 or so “friends” that I had.

I would chide people I didn’t know about their football team, envy people who could post “I just sneezed” and immediately get 95 “likes”, wonder why nobody could see the world the way I did and praise me for my amazing knowledge, foresight, and priceless contributions to the world of Facebook.

One day I woke up and realized I must look very foolish to some people, very smug to others, and very weird to everybody. And in a moment of clarity I had lacked before in my time on the social media, I realized I didn’t need it. That, for me, life would probably be better without it. And it was. (Not to mention I avoided that whole 2016 election, football kneelers, and Tide pod challenge.)

When I began writing this blog last year, to fulfill some pseudo-intellectual exhibitionist need I have, along with also always having enjoyed writing, I began posting links to my blog entries on the Facebook. That was it- log-in, post the link, log-out. I didn’t look to see if anyone had liked or commented on recent posts- it wasn’t about Facebook but promoting Bondo- the real deal.

But after awhile, it sucked me back in. In the past few months, my involvement incrementally grew. But on the advice of my wife, I decided to take a new approach- lighten up, be more positive, and remember “nobody cares about politics.”

So I determined to stay out of controversy, be more mature, and not take the world so seriously. I didn’t argue with anyone about anything. I just posted memes for the most part- inspirational quotes, funny animals, non-controversial commentary on this crazy life we are going through. The 150 friends I still had seemed to like the new approach.

But I am still, at heart, a politico. And, our dysfunctional political system is a fertile field. There was a small group of my Facebook buddies who were like-minded, so I dropped a few of those too. Then I decided that one day a week- Friday- I would be political. “Political Friday.” What the heck.

It was, to me, pretty tame, fairly mainstream and the latest stuff everybody else was discussing. (From a conservative viewpoint, of course.) I didn’t dare post some of the stuff I see- not for fear of being banned- but I’m just not into offending anyone anymore. If someone didn’t like something I posted, and commented so, I would diplomatically acknowledge their opinion, and move on.

This new approach worked well until last Friday, when I posted this:

A few minutes later I got a notification that my post had violated Facebook’s “Community Standards” and had been removed. Huh? That? I had seen things a hundred times worse posted everyday.

Although slightly annoyed, and puzzled more than anything else, I continued “political Friday.” A bit later, I posted this:

Within a few minutes I was advised once again that I had violated “Community Standards” against hateful and offensive speech and could not post again for 24 hours.  

I’ve heard of this happening but had never experienced it. It is real. There was an option to have this decision reviewed so I clicked it.

After a short period, the “appeal” came back and they upheld their ban. They provided a box for comment on this action. I figured the comment would be either ignored or read by a robot- but in the odd chance a real person would read it I advised them that they “were the real Nazis”.

You see, I know these people very well. I know how their small, little minds think. To them, there is nothing worse in all this world than a “Nazi”- and, to them, a “Nazi” is a conservative. Being white and Christian is also bad, but being a white Christian Conservative male is the pinnacle of Nazi-ism. In their Facebook-moderating world. So I knew, if an actual person at Facebook did see that I was telling them they were the real Nazis, it would make them angry.

Considering Facebook has literally billions of accounts, I didn’t really think my comment would be viewed by an actual person. I was just venting to make myself feel better.

Well, once my 24 hour punishment had expired, I discovered that real people do read your feedback when I tried to post again. I was re-directed to a page that advised me that I couldn’t “go live”- which apparently means post and comment- for 29 more days.

Take that and learn your lesson Bondo- you hater. No explanation,  and no box for comment this time either.

I decided not to wait out the 30 days like some grovelling addict, and figured my account was now “flagged” anyways- meaning I would probably never get to have much freedom of expression anymore, so I deleted my account.

I wondered for awhile if I had been caught by an algorithm or if somebody had reported me- and neither one made much sense. I had been posting memes for a few weeks that were similar. I wanted to warn others, and know for myself for future reference in case I decided to ever come back.

And then, when I googled the Gillibrand meme for this article, I got my answer:

https://www.factcheck.org/2019/05/meme-distorts-gillibrands-immigration-idea/

Meme Distorts Gillibrand’s Immigration Idea

Editor’s note: FactCheck.org is one of several organizations working with Facebook to debunk misinformation shared on social media. Our previous stories can be found here.

Share The Facts

Viral meme- A meme claims: “Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand says that she wants to give Social Security benefits to illegal aliens.”

My Gillibrand meme had already been fact-checked. If you read carefully, it’s not false- it “distorts.” Making me a violator of community standards. Posting a statement Hitler- not me- said, makes me a “hater.”

I ask again, who is the real Nazi?

So, what do we learn? Posting true and factual information is not allowed if it is not the truth according to Factcheck.org.

This is behavior modification, nothing more, nothing less. Facebook is a “ministry of truth”.

Facebook recently dropped their slogan “it’s free and always will be.”

Good thing, because that statement wouldn’t pass a fact check. Not if you’re talking about speech.

the bonderosa

the citrus tree border of the bonderosa garden plot

Home gardening is a rewarding endeavor- it is a connection with nature, a useful skill, and gets you involved in physical activity. But be warned- once you have grown your own tomatoes, melons, or peppers- you will realize that those pretty veggies at the grocery store are more suited for the bowl on the coffee table than the bowl on the kitchen table.

I’ve never crunched the numbers- just the veggies- but I suspect you don’t save much money- if any- by growing your own. But that is not why I do it. The produce is SO much better, it is fun and rewarding, and, these days especially, you know you aren’t getting pesticide- laced GMO poison fruit. That tastes like plastic.

oranges

One day, I was speculating about the size of my property in comparison to my neighbors. Though not drastically, it seemed to me that my little plot was smaller. So, I found a plat map and discovered that not only was it smaller than the neighbors- I, in fact, have the smallest lot in my whole town. I take great pride in this for some reason, because to the best of my knowledge, nobody else in town has the crop yield that comes from the Bonderosa- the smallest urban garden in my area.

cucumbers

That is the first thing to know about the home garden- you don’t need 200 acres, 40 acres, or a large backyard. In fact, you don’t need any land at all. Many, many plants can be grown in containers. Some even do better in containers. Peppers, tomatoes, berries, citrus- just to name a few- can be grown on a deck, porch, or windowsill. We don’t live off of our small plot at the Bonderosa- but when the SHTF- it could certainly provide enough to keep us nutrified and sustained if we needed it too with some effort and commitment.

jalapenos

The next thing you need to know- is what will grow where you are. The Bonderosa’s location in Southeast Texas is Zone 9- Zone 1 being the coolest, Zone 10 the warmest. We have the advantage of very few frosts and freezes, so we basically have a year round growing season. We have a spring garden, a summer garden, a fall garden, and a winter garden. This is, of course, rare in the gardening world, but with a backyard/patio garden you will be surprised how much growing season you can manipulate with coverings, mulches, and lights- which isn’t possible with large acreage gardens. But, despite all the preparations and enrichments one might employ, some things simply do not grow in certain environments.

bell peppers

No matter what or how we try, we simply cannot grow certain things here. Whether it be due to humidity, elevation, soil composition, or other environmental conditions- you will not succeed in trying to grow cherries, almonds, walnuts, raspberries, mangoes, cranberries, lilac, or spruce- just to name a few. There are also extreme limitations and intensive preparations required to grow select hybridized varieties of things such as apples, peaches, plums, pineapples, grapes, blueberries, potatoes, and avocados. Conversely, some things such as pecans, blackberries, and citrus grow wild here and require minimal effort. Other things will GROW just fine, but will never produce fruit.You have to know what will and won’t grow in your area.

At the Bonderosa, we have some plants that I call “money crops”. Not that I try to actually sell them and make money, but they are plants that are perfectly suited for the environment, and produce large amounts of fruit with minimal effort. Some of the things that grow perfectly here and produce an unbelievable amount of food- “bang for the buck”- are blackberries, okra, tomatoes, green beans, and peppers. For example, I have just six okra plants in my garden right now and they make so much that we cannot eat them all. Nor can I even hardly have the time to be diligent enough to pick them all while they are producing without some becoming too large and tough. We have gallon freezer bags of blackberries and peppers almost year round.

okra flowers

Commercial farmers in our area grow rice, cotton, and pecans. Some also grow corn and sorghum, but not as much. Many commercial crops, such as corn and rice can be grown in the home garden, but aren’t practical because it takes large amounts of acreage or plants to get a productive crop. These are all factors to consider when choosing which plants to grow in your garden.

At the Bonderosa, in general, we grow the following:

the guardian of the field- tate

Spring- squash, green beans, pinto beans, red potatoes, tomatoes, blackberries, carrots, peppers, cucumbers, onions, cantaloupes, sunflowers, and eggplant.

Summer- black-eyed peas, purple hulled peas, okra, sweet potatoes, and peppers. It is just too hot to really grow much of anything else that can tolerate the heat.

Fall- tomatoes, red potatoes, beans, carrots, cucumbers, and sometimes squash. As you can see, there are similarities in the spring and fall crops due to the temperatures and hours of sunlight, but some do better in the spring- like red potatoes and tomatoes- because the sunlight and temperature are increasing, while some like the decreasing conditions in fall- like carrots.

Unlike most zones, we can grow quite a few things in winter, and in many ways it is our favorite garden varieties. Our winter crops include broccoli, celery, cauliflower, lettuce, cabbage, spinach, and sweet peas.

Another thing you will learn, is what plants to gather seed from, and which ones are a waste of time. Some plants will not grow from seeds you gather- new ones must be bought each time like broccoli and carrots- while others, like beans, squash, and melons will do quite well from collected seeds. I have a variety of heirloom tomatoes that have become “hybridized” to the Bonderosa. They have become better with each succeeding generation of plants grown from our seeds.

yummy fried okra fresh from the garden to the plate

I encourage everyone to try out the home garden. It is fun, rewarding, and delicious. It is a connection with nature and with an ancient skill. You will gain an appreciation for what our ancestors and forefathers went through- and realize how fortunate we are today that we don’t have to worry about droughts and freezes and pestilences threatening our very survival. And, it is assuring somehow, that if you really HAD to provide for yourself, you would have some skills that would benefit you greatly.

cantaloupe- had to cut a piece off. organic, natural fruits do have flaws- far better to cut off a piece than eat pesticides

If you have any questions, never hesitate to contact me- I am always willing to share what I know.

Get growing! and start a real green revolution in your world.

the citrus tree border of the bonderosa garden plot

you’ve got a friend in me

joy and fellowship

(I recently saw that there were over 400 cats/kittens at our local shelter) Right now, there is a forever friend for you at your local SPCA, animal shelter, rescue, or pound. You can find a friend for life, a friend that will show you love unconditional and loyalty. This friend will put its’ hope and faith in you- which will teach you alot about yourself- and a rewarding friendship and bond will be the result.

 

Genesis 2: 19- And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

steadfast and loyal

Because they are creatures and creations of God, all creatures great and small bear witness to the wonderful attributes of God, and through them we are shown many Godly traits.

Proverbs 12:10- A righteous man regardeth the life of his beast: but the tender mercies of the wicked are cruel.

Go to your local shelter, pound, rescue, or SPCA and take a look at some of these little pets and you will see one that loves you and needs you very much.

You may be surprised at how much you needed that little one as well.

friendship and protection

Even if you are unable to adopt a pet at this time or are unsure, many places have foster programs. You take care of an animal who is usually recuperating/rehabbing for a period of time. This could be anywhere from a day or two up to being able to eventually adopting the pet. It is a good way to get to know various prospective pets and let your confidence grow that you can take care of a pet.

If you simply cannot get one but love the animals- you can volunteer at one of these places as well. They really need the help for things like walking the shelter animals and would appreciate it, not to mention the animals themselves, who crave love and attention.

industrious

The best thing about pets is they know what is truly important. They do not care about whatever temporary crisis that is causing you pain and distress, they only know that you are feeling sadness and they will mourn with you, and let you know that everything is going to be ok. They do not care whatever vainglorious event has made you giddy- they only know you are happy and they rejoice with you.

 

For every beast of the forest is mine, and the cattle upon a thousand hills. I know all the fowls of the mountains: and the wild beasts of the field are mine.- Psalm 50: 10-11

All of the creatures great and small are God’s creations and His handiwork. I recommend taking a few minutes from time to time and observe the wonders. The intricate, dedicated work of the spiders’ web. The endless labors and travails of the squirrel. The gliding hawk, who sails for miles unmoving, like an un-tethered kite. The shenanigans of a raccoon. The chorus of insects, birds, and whatever else singing, calling, making a sound. All play their role, fulfill their calling, contribute to the Creation, which is meant to be wondrous and good.

skillful and watchful

peace and love

 

 

wisdom and discernment

 

 

First published April 30, 2018

tator hears a mew

All of a sudden, Tate started dancing excitedly and pulling me towards the ditch. We were on our daily walk, and I always had to be on guard near ditches, after  having previously finding myself sprawled out in one when Tate suddenly decided to take a dip in the ditch water.

We were at the end of our street, and as I braced for a dive, Tate pulled against the leash and made his way down the side to the opening of the culvert. Afraid he might have located a snake, I began calling him and tried to pull him back up. He stopped, looked at me, and then looked back at the culvert opening. As I prepared to dig in and get him back out of the ditch, I saw the little tan kitty sitting in the opening of the culvert. He let out a little meow.

Tator heard a mew.

tate and frankie

We didn’t see any other kitties or mama cat, so we ran home to report our find to the animal expert- my wife. After gathering the facts, she advised that there were several new kitties at that end of the street, and it had probably been temporarily stationed there by its mother, or even separated, and it was probably best to not move it.

I had forgotten about it, until we passed by the next day. Tate hadn’t forgot, and began pulling that direction as we neared. We arrived at the corner, and there was the kitty, sitting in the culvert opening. After a couple of greeting barks and a happy dance, he turned to me, and cocked his head motioning to me- “You see it?”

We ran home again, and this time the wife agreed it was time to rescue Tates’ discovery. After the kitty retreated into the culvert, my wife opened a can of food and set it down at the opening.

After two days, at least, of culvert life, kitty immediately threw caution to the wind and went straight to the food. After a couple of bites, my wife picked up the food with one hand, and before she could grab it with the other, the poor hungry creature began frantically licking the dirt where the can had just been. I wanted to name him “Calvert” in honor of the place where he was found- but the wife named it Frankie, which turned out to be better since it turned out to be a female kitty.

frankie and tate

We’ve taken in stray kitties before, and there is always an adjustment period. They will hide under a couch or bed for a couple of days, slowly venturing out as they become more at ease with the new environment. Once, two strays I nabbed at a chemical plant stayed under the couch for over two weeks. No this one. From the get-go, he was comfortable with the new place.

That impressed me. A kitty that isn’t too proud to admit a house is better than a culvert straightaway. He was grateful to have been rescued, and he knows who is responsible: Tate. The rescued became the rescuer.

I am convinced, at that first meeting, Frankie told Tate she was lost and needed help. Even though we made her wait another day, Tate remembered his friend and led me back.

There is a Frankie (or a Tate) waiting for you to rescue them. If not in the ditch, for sure at your local shelter, pound, or rescue. They will be grateful, and your life will be better.